A personal reflection of how God has filled with me with His wisdom this weekend ( Wis 7:7: "I prayed and prudence was given me. I pleaded and the spirit of wisdom came to me") He has always filled me with His wisdom, but I never took the time and effort to write it down as a thanksgiving to Him.

Well, I was under "house arrest" this weekend not out of my own free will. I was diagnosed with viral conjunctivitis-sore eyes! I was quite distraught when the doc said that I have to stay home over the weekend because it's contagious. What? Cannot go out!? Initially, I was quite positive about staying home as I knew that it is part of God's plan for me was to have a good rest! And I did-slept an average of 12 hours for the past 2 days. This is the first weekend in a very long time which has given me time to do the many things that I needed to do-making presents for others, catching up on some reading, calling up people about prayer group stuff...

Seems like I was quite occupied. However, I was also busy engaging myself in the area of habitual sin as well. I was feeling very crummy over it, especially today. I was really at a loss about what I need to do about it. I felt quite bored too because I never watched so much cable TV in months!

Anyway, I went for evening mass. (Relax, my eyes are okay already). The priest who celebrated mass opened his prayer about the fact that many of us "live to eat & don't eat to live" anymore. I was very struck by that because while I was catching up on my newspaper reading today, I remember this credit card ad very clearly that with this particular card & its discounts, it stated that we just have to live to eat! No need to eat to live anymore!

I realised that I have been so immersed & bombarded by the secular values of this world that I realised that I can't tell the difference anymore. I'm a person who is quite picky about my food-if I feel like Malay or Japanese food, I'll go all out to have that as my next meal. Even when I go out with my friends & colleagues, I seem to be the decision-maker of what we're gonna eat next. Ok, don't get me wrong- eating is not wrong. But, I realised that being enslaved to food has caused me to see the things of the world in the same light too. Being possessed by our wealth- the wealth of good food, fine living & housing, nice clothes, luxurious lifestyles & hobbies.

At this point, I remembered what an African cardinal preached during the World Youth Day through his teaching about "Being Saints of the New Millennium". He said that the church recommends fasting every Wednesdays & Fridays & even to go totally without food on one of those days! And he also said that fasting is the death of vices, the fortress of chastity, the master of masters, the discipline of disciplines. Fast!

I related very well to the rich young man in the gospel reading. When Jesus told him to "go and sell everything you own and give the money to the poor & you will have treasure in heaven, then come follow me ( Mk 10:21), I prayed and told Jesus that it's so difficult to do that. In reply to that, Jesus has the answer glaring in my face in the next few lines of the gospel-" For men, it is impossible, but not for God: because everything is possible for God." (Mk 10:27)

The priest also preached about transformation-are we transformed by the Word? "The word of God is something active & alive, it is sharp & can enter within." (Heb 4:12) I feel that many times I know what God is telling me what to do, but I hardly put it into practice. I hear, but do not listen.

Finally, Jesus promised us that "there is no one who has left house, brothers, sisters, father, children, land for the sake of the Gospel who will not be repaid a hundred times over houses, brothers, sisters, mothers, children, land-not without persecutions, now in this present time & in the world to come, eternal life." (Mk 10: 29-30)

My brothers & sisters, I urge you to choose the wisdom & values of God & not the wisdom of the world. Many times, like me, we don't even realise that these secular values pervade our entire beings & the way we live. Pray for the transforming power of God to change your life now.

Keep me in your prayers.

In His Joy,
Karen Kuah